My name is J. Brian Terry, and welcome to snippets of my life. For the big picture, check me out at www.commonterry.com. You can reach me at maplejar(at)gmail(dot)com.

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I wish that you could see
How beautiful you are to me
I can’t tell you
I can’t share
I’m not even sure
you would care
But if you did
If that were so
There is one thing
I’d want you to know
If God gave me the tools
to create my one
I’d tell him I could not best
what he’s already done
With you

“She’s Perfect”
5/24/2012
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This is another poem that I can’t seem to finish. I’m not sure if I’ve said everything I want to say with it, but at the same time I’m not sure what more I could say that’s not already said. Make sense? Just trying to get things off my chest that I feel I could never express any other way.

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Here’s a new poem I started working on today. It’s not finished yet - not sure if I will finish it. Sometimes I have a flash of inspiration and I’ll start writing, and then I want to do something else and not think about things (when I’m writing about depressing things that is). So I let it sit and marinate. Sometimes the inspiration fades and the poem stays a fragment, sometimes I’ll pick it back up later and finish it. So - not sure where this one will end up. In any event - here it is….

This runaround - I can’t take it
Anymore but I can’t shake it
The feelings burst I can’t control it
My mistake always console it
Wisdom earned I foresake it
Heart still beats after I break it (again)
License to dream - I now revoke it
Put this dream in my pipe and smoke it

There’s just no way
not today
There’s nothing left
for me to say
Seem to imply
but feelings lie
No right or wrong
And there’s no why
My hopes are lies
This is my prize
For the way things are
It’s no surprise
There’s just no way
Not today…
Not ever!
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So that’s all I have for now. I kinda like it, so I hope I do finish it at some point. I am really blessed, and I know it. Life has been pretty good to me, more or less, since I got divorced in 2005. But when I was younger, I always thought I’d be married to an awesome woman (my ex was not an awesome woman - not to or for me anyway), and we’d have some kids, by the time I was in my 40s. I’ve always loved kids. But I’m here alone, and I’m just depressed about it right now.

So I have to think about other things instead. It’s too easy to wallow in the things in your life that aren’t going the way you want them to, and turn a blind eye to your blessings. It’s too easy to feel sorry for yourself. So I’m going to move on right now. Maybe when I’m feeling more upbeat, I’ll come back and finish this poem and try to put a spin like that on it. We’ll see….

B

"All the art of living lies in a fine mingling of letting go and holding on."

- Henry Ellis

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This is a poem I wrote 4 years ago. The message of it remains as true today as it was back then. Regardless of the people you meet in the world who hurt you, or try to put you down, or make you feel like you’re less than zero, you have to keep the torch you carry for yourself burning bright. You have to love you. If you can’t do that, then other people are going to have trouble loving you.

And why people do the things they do, or how they do them, or for what reasons, and blah blah freaking blah - you have to realize that those things do not matter. People are who they are. All you can do is be the best you that you can be. Sometimes the greatness of you can change someone - make them better. But most of the time people are already who they’re always going to be. You have to learn to let those people who are not healthy for you to have around go and walk away. You’ll only drive yourself crazier, crazier than what they drove you to begin with, trying to understand them, and that’s not going to do anyone any good. You’re better than that, and that is the bottom line. The bottom line is all that matters. It may be cliche, but sometimes you have to just forgive and forget. Those two things really go hand in hand in life: forgive them, but forget them and walk away.

Now, yes, I am out of control in this poem. But as with most of the things I write, it’s firmly tongue in cheek - hence the title. It’s supposed to make you laugh as much as it makes you think. I hope it works for you as much as it does for me….



I hate the world today
Insane or stupid people
Always in my way
Though there are my selected few
You know who you are
You’re each a shining star

Yesterday I lied
Said I love her
But God knows that I’ve tried
It’s just that she is such a bitch
She always wants her way
She never scratches my itch
And she wants me made of clay

But I kick ass
Indeed I rock
They’re not worthy
To suck my cock
I am all that they will seek
With my tongue here in my cheek
I’m the dude; I’m the king
They wish they had my ring
Because I know they know what they cannot replace

What is left to say
Through the ups and downs
Life is but a play
I try to share the marquee
Here on my center stage
Was this their cage?

I just wish that they would try
To use their brains
But that assumes a lie
They cannot use what just isn’t there
Mediocrity feels fine
Instead of better they seek fair
And the fault is always mine

But I kick ass
I’m too cool
They’re not worthy
To eat my stool
I am all that they will seek
With my tongue here in my cheek
Yes I rule; I’m the king
Their bitch ass gets nothing
Of all I am just get the hell out of my face!

We all keep asking ourselves why, but the reasons don’t even matter
If you don’t believe in yourself, then no one else ever will

I’m the one
To answer their prayer
But they’re not worthy
To breathe my air
I am all that they will seek
With my tongue here in my cheek
I’m their dream; I’m the king
They had my sweet something
They let it go and now it’s gone without a trace

Don’t you
Forget about me
Don’t, don’t, don’t, don’t
As if you could
Forget about me

—“Cheeky”
J. Brian Terry
October 2007 

I have the musical score from the film “Interview with the Vampire” in my head. I love that flick, and the score, by Elliot Goldenthal, is perhaps one of the most perfect movie scores I have ever heard. It evokes the gothic feel of the movie, not to mention Louis’ ongoing sense of horror and loneliness, so perfectly that the movie wouldn’t be the same without it. “Libera Me” is my favorite cue - it’s just absolutely brilliant. It’s also perfect autumn / Halloween music! My favorite time of the year!

Going to see The Thing tonight - can’t wait! :) This begins my annual scary movie viewing-fest where I will watch as many scary movies as I can between now and Halloween. Woo Hoo!

Going to see The Thing tonight - can’t wait! :) This begins my annual scary movie viewing-fest where I will watch as many scary movies as I can between now and Halloween. Woo Hoo!

“You’re Dead Wrong” - by Mayday Parade. Awesome song! “She’s got broken things where her heart should be….”

Waiting on the shuttle at Arts Center.

Waiting on the shuttle at Arts Center.

This plaque commemorates my 5-year anniversary with Turner Broadcasting. I can’t believe it’s been 5 years already! Wow. I’m looking forward to another quick 5 years, and hopefully even more! :)

This plaque commemorates my 5-year anniversary with Turner Broadcasting. I can’t believe it’s been 5 years already! Wow. I’m looking forward to another quick 5 years, and hopefully even more! :)

Feeling like a winner. My fantasy football team, The Time Lords, won our game this week. This is my “home jersey”. I am definitely a mad man with a box! :) Check out my post on commonterry.com, 9/30 through 10/03/2011, which is the companion post for this pic.

Feeling like a winner. My fantasy football team, The Time Lords, won our game this week. This is my “home jersey”. I am definitely a mad man with a box! :) Check out my post on commonterry.com, 9/30 through 10/03/2011, which is the companion post for this pic.